The Groom's Role in Wedding Planning

Does it seem like your groom really isn’t that into planning your wedding? 

Most grooms just want their brides to be happy. I hear it all the time, the grooms typical response is, “whatever you want,” when his bride to be asks him about the wedding planning process. “Just tell me what to wear and what time I have to show up,” he continues you. 

As a wedding planner and former bride, I think it’s ok and it doesn’t mean that he doesn’t care! 

Grooms didn’t grow up dreaming about their wedding, or playing dress up as a bride. A groom just wants to get married, and most of the time, the small details don’t really matter to him. I’ve heard many grooms say that they trust what their bride will choose.

Before you get too involved in planning the wedding, have a conversation with your groom to find out what parts of the wedding your groom wants to be involved in. Find out what parts of important to him - what he wears, what food you are serving, choosing the first dance song, or maybe the wedding dessert. Our planning guide xx goes into more detail with involving or not involving the groom. A very important part of the wedding to discuss with the groom is the budget. Some other things the two of you can talk about together are the wedding date and other details that the groom may have a say in. If you have one conversation right away, you can cross off a lot on your list while still involving the groom - there’s no need to give him a daily update of the wedding plans! 

If your groom just wants you to be happy, then make sure you both understand and communicate this. 

If you are more of the planner, your groom may trust you with the decisions of the day. I’ve also had a few grooms plan the whole wedding, without me talking to the bride until the day of! If both of you aren’t big planners, consider a super simple wedding or finding an all-inclusive wedding venue. 

Brides, if you need help from your groom then ask for it! 

Grooms, if you want to find out more about the planning process, ask! 

If it gets too stressful, it may be because you aren’t planning YOUR wedding. There may be way too many people giving advise, the planning make be way to stressful or maybe way too big. If weeks go by and the stress is getting worse, not better, book a call with me. I can help walk you through some ideas before you decide to cancel. (I’ve got a personal story about this one, so I get it.)

Don’t talk bad about your bride and groom to family and friends, instead see if family can friends can lend a helping hand. If your family and friends are the ones causing the stress, then grooms, you may have to have that talk with your mother to keep her options for your sisters wedding or remind your mom that it’s your bride’s day.