Our take on the top 5 wedding guest complaints – we respond to Bride’s Magazine
Recently, I came across this response from Bride’s Magazine blog article. To read the article click here.
They outlined the top 5 wedding guest complaints and how to avoid them. I agree with some of their responses, but other responses I’ll go ahead and give you my two cents about.
- The date was inconvenient – Their response was something like talking to family and friends before you set your date.
My response – Yes, it would be the polite thing to talk to close family and friends to see if they are available for your wedding, but really, who’s wedding is it anyways? Let’s see…it is YOUR wedding! Most plans can be changed by close family and friends if they really want to attend your wedding. Plus, if you had to ask 5 people on the grooms side and 5 people on the brides side if they were available for your planned wedding date, chances are there’d probably be about 2 people who couldn’t attend. You can always respond by saying that you’d love to have them be there for your special day but understand if they can’t make it.
- There was too much time in between the ceremony and reception – Their response was something like an hour and a half is normal time between the two so plan a light snack or hospitality lounge for the guests who may be waiting
My response – Planning something for the guests is a great idea! I think it would be fun to have some kind of activity or game for them between the ceremony and reception if the ceremony is at the same place as the reception. Games could be something fun like lawn bowling, corn hole, or ring toss – think carnival fun. Activities could be a coffee bar or photo booth filled with props. If the reception is not at the same place as your ceremony, allow for drive time for the guests. Instead of a snack or hospitality lounge, see if your reception venue will set up some water, tea, and lemonade for guests and open up the bar a little early. The hour and a half time between the two is also so you can get some pictures – family photos, bridal party photos, and then photos of the newly married couple. If you have an activity or something for your guests to do then you won’t feel rushed to come back to the reception.
- I had to sit with complete strangers at the reception – Their response was something like trying to make the guests sit with someone they know.
My response – So on top of all the wedding planning and that ever growing list of things to do, you now need to make sure Judy from work is sitting next to someone she knows. This may be an impossible task when planning the seating chart. Remember, you have x number of chairs per table and need to fill them with number of people. Chances are guests will want to play musical chairs anyways and your seating chart will not look like you planned it on the day of your wedding! If Judy from work doesn’t know anyone at her table, hopefully someone at the table has an outgoing personality and will make Judy feels comfortable. Or any easy solution for the who am I sitting by dilemma is to eliminate the seating chart all together and let people sit where ever they’d like. You can reserve one table for the bride’s family and one for the groom’s family so they don’t get stuck being separated, while other tables are up for grabs!
- There were way too many speeches – Their response was something like limit the number and alert the DJ to cue music to cut people off.
My response –Give the DJ your list of speakers and let them be in charge of the who gets to talk and when. If you opened up the mic to speeches, you don’t want drunk Uncle John to get up and ramble on forever about how he never thought you’d find a women and end up a bachelor living up in the mountains. If you happen to have a lot of people who want to speak, see that as a positive. You have people who really want to share something about the two of you and their hopes for you. If this is the case, then space out the speeches. You can have someone give a welcome speech, prayer over the meal, speech after the salad course, and then toast speech.
- I never even got to talk to the bride – Their response was something like blocking out some time to say hello or pass around the favors to each table.
My response – In an ideal world time would slow time during your wedding reception and you’d get to do all the things you’d hoped you’d accomplish. The reception flies by! Not to mention if you have 100 plus guests the reality is you’ll be lucky if you at least smile at each guest, let alone greet them. I had a small wedding of 45 people and did have the time to go around and thank the guests. But did I talk to all of them? Unfortunately, no I did not. There were even some guests on my side that didn’t get to officially meet my husband. If you have friends and family who you haven’t seen in over a year, make it a point to reach out to those people and say hello. Also, if there are people who have traveled a far way to see you on your wedding then these people should also be ones you stop by and say hello to.
During the planning of your wedding you will hear some comment from someone and someone will not be happy with a decision or two you make. Just remember that this is a special day for the two of you and try to ignore the comments.
If planning your wedding is getting too stressful you can always contact Coastal California Weddings and have us plan a small, intimate wedding.
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